Stubborn

You see,
here's the thing about getting yourself emotionally attached to someone.
One wrong step and then
BAM!

Falls apart.
and you have nobody to blame but yourself.
because you let yourself get a hold too much of someone or something.

Thomas Hardy was right to never expect much.
Because in the end, when everyone else is disappointed at how things went,
he was content and accepting.
and although he wasn't exactly happy, at least he wasn't living in a life that's going downhill.
he was prepared.

Isn't it funny how this always happens?
When you like somebody enough to become exceptionally great friends, something always happens because it's a rush.
This is why the concept of time is real and moving and not merely, well, time.
It takes time to understand people and things.

Yes, eventually they leave but you have been given the honourable privilege to get to know someone or something and to understand them.
If you're lucky, they might stay long enough until you're prepared for the devastating blow of departure. 
If you're strong, they leave you knowing you're just that tough to fight back the emotions. 
That is time. 

It is preparation and itself, a lesson.

There really is no point in rushing. 
Unless you're just that damn sure it'll work.
And unless you're amazingly prepared to fight off those downs.

So here we are again, time after time after being proven to not rush.
here we are, stubbornly against everything else.

the first rule of making your own rules: You don't break them.
because it will really slap you hard. 
the hardest.

If the first step is obeyed, then, follow your other vows. 

HAHAHA who am I to say all these.
I just gave my own self the hardest and possibly the most shameful slap.
buat lagi sekali. 



here goes all the phone and communication devices.
fuck you for not listening to your own self.
and for making a fool out of yourself. 
congratufuckinglations.

xom.